I'm just not ready! If I close my eyes and stomp my foot, refuse to look at the calendar or lock the front door I wonder if that will put it off? What if I refuse to acknowledge it? Yes, I know nothing I can do will delay it.
Monday I picked up Oldest schedule for his Senior year. I've dreaded it, though I know he is looking forward to it. I'm not sure how it happened, but that sweet little boy we brought home from the hospital has grown so quickly, and I wasn't ready. I wonder if we really ever are, but it happens.
I know, it's a part of life and I also know that others have been down this road. But this is a part of the road that I've not been on before, and somehow, this part of the journey seems so different than the roads we've been on before. I have worries - yes, things I've not given to God to handle. Somehow, I stand before him with my fist squeezed tightly - He is there before me with His hand out - open. Waiting for me to release it to Him...
Okay, just so you know, I'm not falling down depressed or anything, just a little sad I guess. I'm so unprepared for school this year. I have yet to set Only's classes up, though Youngest is pretty well done. I'm not sure why I can't seem to get it together this year, and I'm not too happy about it either! I'm usually more pulled together - organized, but not this year! I feel like I have a mound of unfinished projects... I need a little direction somewhere... I think I need some quiet time.
Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life ?